Here I am. Writing about another overly romanticized heartbreak.
Happy Heart's Day, my heart is coincidentally just as happy, I guess. I'm alone, but not lonely. It just so happened I foolishly fell for another human being's reckless antics again. He might have unintentionally made me fall. He might have accidentally strung me along, kept my hopes up and unfortunately left me in midair without a word.
And here I am, with my usual coping mechanism, pulling away and wallowing and writing about it. It's been a while. It took me forever to get infatuated this hard again. Boy, what have you done to me.
I got my tattoos done over the weekend, how lucky I am to be so in love with the art inked on my skin, but at the same time how sad it was for the pain of the needle to be more bearable than the thought of him leaving without even saying goodbye. He took me to the shop that day and held me so that “I wouldn't get lost.” He was there just before I fully surrendered to the pain of getting inked. I should have known that the day would end with me getting hurt over false hopes and bad decisions. I should have listened to the voice in my head telling me to just sleep.
But I stayed. I stayed and ended up waiting for nothing.
I cried over a boy again. Not because I didn't want to lose him. I cried because my emotions got played. I cried because once again, I let another human being ruin my favorite songs for me.